It happens all the time. Whenever I tell people about the primary method I use in my work, they ask:
"What is Sexocorporel?"
L'Approche Sexocorporel is a Sexological Councelling approach that originated in Canada and has become increasingly established in German-speaking countries over the past few years. In this article, I would like to explain, in a clear and accessible way, what Sexocorporel is all about.
Sexocorporel is one of the most comprehensive and at the same time one of the most practical approaches in modern sexology. It integrates knowledge about the body, the mind (thoughts and emotions), and relationships in order to better understand human sexual experience and behavior. It explains how these different dimensions interact and, above all, how sex actually works. Sexocorporel ist einer der fundiertesten und gleichzeitig praxisnahesten Ansätze der modernen Sexualwissenschaft.
What Does Sexocorporel Mean?
The term combines the French words "Sexo" (sexuality) and "Corporel" (bodily).
The name itself already conveys its central idea:
Sexuality does not take place only in the mind—it always takes place in the body as well.
Sexocorporel assumes that sexual experience and behavior emerge from the interaction of several interconnected dimensions. It offers a comprehensive explanatory model that allows us to understand the complexity of human sexuality without losing sight of the whole picture. Most importantly, the model helps identify the many possible causes of sexual difficulties while also providing targeted, body-oriented ways to address them.
The model examines:
- the physical dimension, explaining the sexual arousal function and the concept of the learned arousal mode;
- the cognitive dimension, including thoughts, beliefs, ideals, and personal assumptions;
- the emotional dimension, encompassing pleasure and frustration, joy and shame, as well as fantasies, desires, and needs;
- the relational dimension, including personal relationship history, erotic communication, and each partner's sexual knowledge and skills.
All of these dimensions influence one another—much like the elements of a mobile. When one part moves, all the others begin to move as well.
How Did Sexocorporel Develop?
Sexocorporel was developed in the 1980s by the Canadian sexologist Jean-Yves Desjardins.
His central observation was remarkably simple, yet revolutionary:
People differ not only in what they find sexually appealing, but above all in how they use their bodies during sexual activity—how they "inhabit" their bodies. More specifically, they differ in the way they have learned to generate sexual arousal, allow it to build, and eventually release it through orgasm.
It is precisely this "how" that often determines:
- how intensely pleasure is experienced,
- whether sexual arousal can develop,
- whether sexual arousal can develop,
- whether orgasm is possible,
and whether sexuality is experienced as fulfilling.
For the first time, the body itself became the central focus of sex therapy. However, the goal was not to search for pathology. Instead, Desjardins focused on the body's inherent resources:
- movement,
- breathing,
- rhythm,
- and muscle tone.
These four resources form the foundation of the Sexocorporel approach.
The Learned Arousal Mode
The interaction of these four bodily resources—movement, breathing, rhythm, and muscle tone—creates what Sexocorporel calls the learned arousal mode. It first develops during masturbation and later continues to evolve in partnered sexuality.
You could think of it as the unique fingerprint of our sexual arousal: the individual way each of us has learned to generate, build, and experience sexual pleasure.
This arousal mode can vary considerably from one person to another.
Some people use only a limited range of their body's resources. Their sexual experience may rely on repetitive, mechanical movements, a constant rhythm of stimulation, and consistently high muscle tension.
Others develop a much more flexible arousal mode. They naturally vary their movements, explore different qualities of touch, play with changing rhythms, and allow muscle tension to rise and fall fluidly throughout the sexual experience.
What Did Desjardins Discover?
Desjardins observed that people experiencing sexual difficulties often made only limited use of their body's full potential.
To address this, he developed a series of body awareness exercises that enabled people to expand their learned arousal mode. As their bodily resources became more accessible and flexible, many were able to overcome the sexual difficulties they had previously experienced.
Sexuality Can Be Learned
One of the most inspiring principles of Sexocorporel is this: Sexuality is not a fixed personality trait—it is a lifelong learning process. And because it is learned, it can also change.
Many people say things like: "I've just never had much sexual desire.» "I'm simply not orgasmic.» "That's just the way I am."
Sexocorporel offers a different perspective. Our sexual experience develops through life experiences, learning processes, and bodily habits.
And whatever has been learned can also be learned differently. This does not mean that everyone will become the same. Rather, it means that nearly everyone has the potential to discover new ways of experiencing their sexuality.
The Body Is Not Just a Supporting Actor
Many forms of psychotherapy focus primarily on emotions, thoughts, or relationship patterns. And those aspects are, of course, important. But sometimes talking alone is not enough. Because sexuality happens through the body.
For this reason, Sexocorporel asks questions such as:
- How do I breathe?
- How do I move my pelvis?
- How much muscle tension do I hold?
- How do I perceive touch?
- Am I able to allow sexual arousal to emerge in my body?
These questions are central to the Sexocorporel approach. Depending on the answers, specific body awareness exercises are suggested to deepen perception and help develop the body's natural capacities.
Sexual Difficulties Are Rarely "Just Psychological"
When people experience sexual difficulties, they often assume that the causes must be psychological or related to their relationship.
Certainly, stress, conflict, or painful life experiences can play an important role.
However, bodily factors are often equally significant, for example:
- excessive muscle tension,
- shallow breathing,
- limited pelvic mobility,
- rigid or automatic movement patterns,
- reduced body awareness.
All of these factors directly influence how sexual arousal develops and how pleasure is experienced.
One of the strengths of Sexocorporel is that it explains these bodily mechanisms in a clear and understandable way while offering practical methods to change them.
One of the strengths of Sexocorporel is that it explains these bodily mechanisms in a clear and understandable way while offering practical methods to change them.
Embodiment – How the Body Shapes Our ExperienceEmbodiment
A concept that has gained increasing recognition in modern psychology and neuroscience is the theory of Embodiment.
The term embodiment refers to the idea that our experiences are embodied—they are not created solely by the brain. Rather, our thoughts, emotions, and bodily processes continuously influence one another.
The Body's Resources in Everyday Life
We experience this every day. When we are stressed, we often unconsciously raise our shoulders and begin to breathe more shallowly. When we are sad, we tend to move more slowly and adopt a slumped posture. When we feel confident and secure, we naturally stand taller and breathe more freely. The reverse is equally true.
When we change the way we ›inhabit‹ our bodies, our inner experience often changes as well.
A deeper breath, greater freedom of movement, or a more refined body awareness can influence the way we experience emotions, regulate stress, and perceive sexual desire and arousal.
Interestingly, many of the fundamental ideas of Sexocorporel are now supported by Embodiment research. Although the two approaches were developed independently, they arrive at the same conclusion:
The body and the mind are in constant interaction, continuously shaping one another.
Embodiment and Sexocorporel
This is precisely where Embodiment and Sexocorporel meet.
While many therapeutic approaches aim to facilitate change primarily through conversation and cognitive insight, Sexocorporel also uses the body as the starting point. Because sexuality is not purely a mental experience.
It emerges from the dynamic interaction of the brain, nervous system, breathing, muscle tone, movement, perception, emotions, and relationships.
One could say that Sexocorporel anticipated many of the insights that are now confirmed by Embodiment research and applies them specifically to human sexuality.
The approach demonstrates how our bodily habits shape our sexual experience and behaviour—and how new bodily experiences can create new possibilities for sexual fulfillment.
This does not mean that every sexual difficulty can be explained or resolved through the body alone. Relationship experiences, personal beliefs, emotions, life history, and cultural influences all play important roles.
The strength of Sexocorporel lies precisely in its ability to integrate all of these dimensions while recognizing the body as an essential—yet often overlooked—part of the whole.
Who Can Benefit from Sexocorporel?
Sexocorporel can be helpful for people experiencing:
- low sexual desire,
- orgasmic difficulties,
- erectile difficulties,
- premature or delayed ejaculation,
- pain during sexual activity,
- uncertainty about their sexuality,
- questions regarding sexual development,
- relationship difficulties,
- concerns related to desire and intimacy.
At the same time, Sexocorporel is not only intended for people experiencing sexual difficulties. Many individuals simply wish to understand their sexuality more deeply and experience it in a more conscious, vibrant, and fulfilling way.
A Case Example
A woman comes to therapy because she has experienced very little sexual desire for many years. Initially, she believes the problem is entirely psychological.
As therapy progresses, however, an interesting pattern emerges: during sexual arousal she almost constantly holds her breath, keeps her body tense, and hardly moves her pelvis.
Only through simple body awareness exercises does she begin to notice these automatic patterns (her learned arousal mode). Gradually, she learns to breathe more freely, to perceive her body with greater sensitivity, and to allow it to move more naturally. As a result, not only does her bodily experience change, but so does her experience of sexual desire.
This example illustrates how closely the body and sexual experience are connected.
What Happens in a Sexocorporel Counselling Session?
A common misconception is that Sexological Councelling involves intimate exercises during the session. This is not the case. Throughout the counselling process, clients remain fully clothed. There is no sexual activity and no physical contact between therapist and client.
Instead, the focus is on identifying the different factors that influence the client's sexuality.
Together, therapist and client explore:
- the body's role in sexual functioning,
- new possibilities for change,
- individualized exercises to practise at home,
- and ways to gradually develop a more satisfying sexual experience.
Why I Work with Sexocorporel
What I appreciate most about Sexocorporel is its body-oriented approach without being pathologizing. Rather than focusing on deficits, it helps us understand how bodily arousal, pleasure, and relationships interact. Through body awareness exercises, we become more familiar with our bodies and develop a more conscious relationship with them.
As I often like to say: We learn to truly inhabit our bodies. Or, in other words: We become fully present in our own bodies.
To me, this is one of the greatest strengths of Sexocorporel. It enables each person to better understand, explore, and expand their own unique sexual potential.
Conclusion
Sexocorporel combines modern sexology with direct bodily experience. It shows that sexuality is neither exclusively biological nor exclusively psychological. Rather, it emerges from the continuous interaction of the body, emotions, thoughts, and relationships.
For this reason, Sexocorporel opens new pathways toward greater pleasure, vitality, intimacy, and sexual fulfillment. Because sexuality is not something we simply have. It is something we continuously learn, shape, and develop throughout our lives.
Sources
Handouts and course materials for the Sexocorporel training course in Hamburg.
In addition, texts and lecture notes from the Master’s degree programme in Sexology at Merseburg University of Applied Sciences
Other sources from the web.
